“Why don’t you just get over it?”

If I’m upset over something, why should I have to “get over it” just because everyone else thinks it’s been long enough? Well, maybe it hasn’t been long enough for me. I’m a very emotional person and it takes me a long time to accept and be okay with certain things. Sometimes when I’m hurt it takes me a long time to get over it. And I don’t see what’s wrong with that.

There’s a particular issue in my life that has been bothering me for some time now, and no, I’m not okay with it yet. It still makes me upset even though I’ve tried to accept it and forget about it. Yet everyone keeps telling me that I should be over it by now because “it’s been long enough”. But who gets to decide if it’s been long enough? Surely, it should be the person who’s going through the trauma. Yet everyone I try to talk to about the problem thinks that they know what’s best for my heart. I’m even uncomfortable talking to people about it now because everyone thinks I’m being silly. I don’t feel like my friends accept that there’s still something wrong because they just make me feel stupid for bringing it up. “That’s still bothering you?” “Just let it go, it shouldn’t make you upset!” “You don’t need to keep obsessing over it.” “Didn’t that happen months ago?” “You shouldn’t let it bother you.” Well, it does! I just get the same responses over and over, and it’s not fair. Everyone is different and if you’re my friend you should understand that I don’t get over things easily and you should help me through the problem, not make me feel stupid for still being hung up on it. I think it should be okay to grieve over things for as long as you need to, and that length of time is different for every person and situation.

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